The Wrong Road :

I have been heading down the wrong road for along time. I have changed some things in my life, but not the most important thing. Sure I know some things about Gods Word, and can help decipher or help others try to figure out what a verse in the Bible might mean in reguards to them and sometimes even when my son has a verse that comes to play in my life I can also put that into aspect as to how I need to use that in my life or have used it but not enough and need to use it more. He has come across alot of Bible verses that have been more directed towards his life, but the ones that have concentrated on my life have hit my hard because it has really been a hard road and even harder situation for me to put in the past, because it is an unresolved issue with someone that wont or doesn’t want to work this matter out. Because of this and the fact I haven’t been walking right with God, I haven’t been able to completely FORGIVE and FORGET the situation, and then there is also the fact that some of the other issues, I can only FORGIVE and FORGET because the people are no longer with us so I work them out. Yes it hurts that I am unable to be able to have that time to sit down and talk with them both the ones that are no longer her and the ones that don’t wish to discuss the past, but, I must know choose to take the road that is right for me and that would be the road that be the road that few dare to travel. The Lord is there to assist you down this narrow path.So many people would rather take the wider, it is easier and not as scary, they know that taking they narrow path would be following Jesus and that is something they don’t want to do. Sure it is a scary change for me, it is not going to be easy, I will admit it is going to be quite hard, and yes I am going to fail at times. I have failed God many times, but God has been Gracious, and Forgiving. So I have to really look deep down with in my self and change my ways, some people says before it’s to late but I says it’s never to late. The thing, question for each and every person who reads this post is do you really like living the life that you are living right now, or is it time for a change in your life also. I am now 39 years old and I can really say I am deeply saddened that it took me this long to change my ways, my life, my attitude, my total outlook on life as a whole. I see my future looking dark and grim, if I continue on the path I am on at this point in my life, so I must change before it is too late. I love my family and I would do anything for them, with in the laws of God, and then there is the laws of man, some of them have completely defied the laws of God. I very much disagree with them, and will again have to answer for my actions when the time comes, however there comes a time in a persons life when things have to change. I always wanted to take the easy road, I didn’t want to take the hard road because, I knew the risk of failure was great. I need to change my life. I am in need of help, I also know it’s going to be a struggle, and at times I feel,”is it really worth it. I help people out in so many ways with numerous variations, from manual labor to verbal advice, but yet I don’t know exactly what I need to do to help myself. I have always agreed with the saying that it is easier to help others than it is to help yourself, for instance I am always suggestion to my son how he can be, a better person, and yet not have the attitude, but yet he picks that attitude up for following me. It’s a SAD thing on my part, because I have picked it up from my father and now I’m passing it on to my son. I try daily to change this path, but I can’t manage it on my own. It is a hard choice to change you ways and a struggle do this without help, I have people to me as all people, I ask for help from the Lord on a daily basis and although the other 2 people don’t realize it, I am getting their help, on a daily basis every time I am put in my place or we are just plain talking about the Bible or life in general, our conversations always end up reverting to some verse in the Bible. Although sometimes I feel that one of my helpers can go a little easier with the expressions when frustration comes about. Ex. An interruption can easily frustrate anyone, or when a certain phrase is thrown out, tensions can get high, and voices be raised, my chest starts hurting. I do understand the frustration this helper goes through. Now Don’t take this the Wrong way most of this frustration isn’t directed at me, however it does affect me, and I try to settle things down by saying I know you are frustrated but could you not be so harsh about it. I try my best to slow things down and that is even a struggle because of the interruptions, that certain phrase and emotions. I just know that I am heading down the wrong road and that road can be a long and lonely road at times, When the road is long and lonely Just remember GOD is with you.

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