Tag Archives: wife

The Love of a spouse

There are many people who have been together for many years whether it is a long term relationship or a marriage. My first marriage lasted three  years, don’t get me wrong it started out great, however it started to crash after about the second year. Going into the third year the I left for a while because we soon had things that we didn’t agree on after awhile, I soon realized   that I needed to go home and try to give it another chance we soon moved that house to a place downtown then money situations started to get in the way, she started to ask her mother for money and when I asked her where she got it she would lie about it, then it came to stealing  money for drugs. I soon left the whole situation for good. After awhile I found a lady that I am still with to this day. It is funny how the whole relationship started. My now wife met my mom first then my mom called me to ask for my assistance in helping her move in with my now wife.
When I got over to the house to help her load up the car, the first thing I said to Pam (wife), was my mom don’t need to live with you she needs to be in a place of her own and I was very boisterous when I said this. I soon found out that she didn’t live very far from me, so I would go down to her house to see my mom, and her of course. There were times I would walk in and tell Pam she looked like (crap) replacing it with the more harsher word), however I was actually telling her she looked Beautiful. trying to hide the fact that I was falling in love with her. I could see she was suffering from pain in the legs by the way she walked, but I didn’t know the extent of her medical problems, which didn’t matter to me. Well unbeknownst to me she was also falling in love with me. Then one night we where sitting on the from porch having a few mixed drinks, and some beers, and because I was feeling the effects of the alcohol  and she said why don’t you stay the night.

I gladly excepted, I was going to sleep on the couch but she said no you can sleep in my bed and that’s when I realized she had feelings for me. Now we know what could happen when this case arises, however, I told her we can’t do this because before this does go that for we need to be clear headed.

Now from previous post you all know that she had two children from a previous marriage, It was very strange because her oldest son was just 6 years my Jr, http://wp.me/p1gcCC- and soon he started to get to know me. Then she also had a daughter  and https://thoughtzfrommyheart.wordpress.com/2011/01/01/a-daughter-grown-up/ one thing I told all of them also their father was, I will never try to replace you, you are welcome here to see your children any time you would like.  Now for a long time it was very touchy, not knowing what to do, what was to come. Her son was always gone, her daughter was gone to her aunts from her fathers side. But my father soon said your taking my piece of machinery, my stepmother said then you can deal with his seizures, Pam gladly said I will. I packed my things that I could in her car and left, went back to her house and had a few more drinks on the front porch.  After awhile she went to lay down I was still listening to cassette tapes so I put a tape in my walkman continued to finish my drink and listen to music. Back then I wouldn’t be caught with out some music playing, now my cassettes are gone but the disc man still runs instead of mp3 players and my oldest son say when are you  going to switch to mp3 disc mans are long gone. I said I probably  won’t, I have to much money invest in CDS to waste the cases are gone so selling them aren’t an option. However as they get scratched I will through them away and not replace them.
Now we just celebrated our 20th anniversary the 13th of this month, when we got married it was on a friday, and many people thought that we wouldn’t last more than six months, I am sure that people in the family were even making bets on it.

Now as I continue with my wife it is a love I can’t deny. We have had are issues and our fights, we have had our spats over money but only because I will take between 7 to 9 dollars for a pack of non- filtered smokes, and sometimes I will get upset because she will want to check the checks to make sure that they are wrote out right and the account numbers are correct,  I still call her if I am out to find out if Ii have enough in my account to get a cup of coffee or smokes if I need them. The biggest problem with most people and finances is people want things they cant have so they use money they don’t have or they take money from their spouse without their knowledge and when the spouse finds out they also find out sooner or later they have taken it for something they shouldn’t have, (drugs, gambling, online porn, you have one person who is so controlling with the money that  if you spend an extra dollar on something you shouldn’t have ie a candy bar for yourself or your child, ect.). My wife and I have enough to live comfortably, any we live with what we have, if I get called to help someone with a car situation and I can do it I will help and I just take what they offer, unless I have set a price for certain jobs. If I feel like just helping people out, I will tell them your problem has been taken care of you can be on your way or I am going home now, and there is no charge.  When I have a doctors appt downtown I will stop and get a coffee and buy someone something and my wife knows about it she don’t say anything.  It is a sad situation because most of the divorces are caused by this, and also due to the fact that or jobs have closed and moved south, alot of them that move will open in the south under a different name so they can hide the fact that they just moved like the Life Savers candy company moved south because it was cheaper for sugar. However if people had a better outlook and focused their lives on Christ, their needs would be taken care of. Honestly I haven’t focused my life totally on Christ, but I can say this with my wife, we have been very comfortable with our financial status. We love each other, we care  about each other and our children are as will no matter how old they are.

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Beauty Within:

LIFES' BLESSINGSThere are many things that we will share together, many things that we will share with others
Our Life together has been a blessing to each other for many years
So many days I see the beauty in you face, A face that I married nineteen years ago
Although physical pain has kept it hidden from others, It is still visible to me
It is there when I look into the eyes of the women I see when I walk into the room,
when I see you at the computer, look at your face as you sleep, and wake up in the morning.
Although you wake up in the morning and think I am still sleeping as you try to sneak back into the room I look at the beauty of your face all over once again. The  smiles that you throw every now and then only enforce that inner beauty that I talk about now and see every day.

When I go to bed at night, but can sleep and get back up as I walk out of the room I quickly turn on the hallway light and see that sleeping beauty all over again, and all I can think how luck I was
to find the beautiful women you are. In many ways you have shown the beauty of your heart to many. Like many who show the beauty of their hearts, they don’t realize the greatness of their gift, they say they don’t have that gift or you are just trying to make me feel better because most times when this type of felling is expressed it is when the person is feeling depressed or down. I am say this out of respect for you because I don’t feel that I have expressed how much respect, love and compassion for you as a husband in all this years.

As  said at the top this is one of the things that is going we will share with others, a couples love should be expressed. And as For you my Wife I have Printed Off a copy just for you.

What is it that you Wonder Part 1

Many people wonder who they are now and who they’ll be in the next year or so. I am wondering what has to change. Many people wonder where they are will be in two years. I ask, Am I even going to be alive tomorrow. As a 41 year old who as a boy used church as a way to get away from the Sunday morning beatings, I grew up going to various churches and yes learned a few things about Christ and the Greatest Gift, that was given to us for our sins. I have asked The Lord into my life over the years, but as I got older and the more I got out on my own I started to avoid church, started drinking, on Sundays’ instead of church I would sit at home or go visit friends and drink. I got married to my first wife when I was 18, although she never claimed to be a Christian she listened to Christian music such as,

She would also listen to your much more secular music which I am glad to say wouldn’t be the Running with The Devil by Van Halen, but others such as

My mother-in-law on the other hand was very devout, and the only music you heard her listen to was Christian music like

and the fact that her house was nowhere near a church and never having a drivers license, city bus didn’t run by her house on Sunday, she did daily bible studies in her front room. One day she asked me if i wanted to join her and I said with a hesitating voice yeaaahh, then as I sat down I began to question myself. Over and over What did I get myself into. Now having gone to churches of different denominations, I could hide amongst the other parishioners, or leave if I wanted to, (that’s only if I went by myself). However after sitting there reading the Bible and fifteen minutes went by I asked her, how long are we going to read, and she said to me oh you can stop any time, as for myself I read the whole chapter, I asked her why she does that and she replied by saying then I will do this and she pulled out a study guide. Well after I got done ready the whole chapter she asked me if I was going to also do the study guide and I said sure. We then as I found a place that I could afford and moved, which certainly stopped Bible study again and even though I was closer to numerous churches, I chose not to go. My drinking and lazy days were back, and I would rather do that, than have the responsibility of getting up on Sunday and going to church, Further more I didn’t have a Bible so Bible study at home wasn’t going to work either.

After three years, my then wife, had taken the rent money to by cocaine, well that was all I could take I wasn’t going to put up with this. I wasn’t even going to try to forgive her and work on coming up with the rent money again, I had my mind set that if she did it once she was just going to do it again. Needless to say there was noway I was going to be able to come up with $650.00 by the next day, let alone pay the lender back, when I returned home and heard her lies as to what happened to the money, I packed up what I needed and left. Going back to retrieve the remaining clothes five days later I knew what happened. My wife had turned into a cocaine addict,
I had my suspicions about this before I had even left but didn’t have the proof. When I returned I had all the proof I needed.

To be Continued

17 years

 17 years and numerous tears, various likes and dislikes
Completely different illnesses neither one we like, But the two things we have in common is, what we will do is take  care of each other when either one of us go down, and take care of our children no matter what the age is. Many times I say no, But you now I am a Joker, and I love to see the reaction, but even though some of them don’t know when I am joking and even get upset and even mad at times, but in the end they all know that I will come through for them. MY wife I have loved from day one the first day we met, we had a disagreement over my mother living with her. and then the next summer I was on a trip with her to her to Holland Mi., where her brother lived and I asked her 3 times in three different ways if she would marry me and she never caught on it wasn’t until I came right out and said, Will you marry ME that she caught on to what I was trying to ask.Now 17 years later we are still going strong and will continue to go strong until the GOOD LORD takes one of us or both of us.

The Wife of a LIFETIME!!!

Being married for 16 years and the mother to the 2 children in the recent postings and the mother of a posting yet to come later, she is older than me by 14 years, but hey  the older they are the wiser they are.  As do I she has medical problems and we continue to help each other through them as a spouse should do. When her legs hurt her because of no cartilage in either knee, she gets upset and all I can do is say, I am here to do the things that you can’t such as climb stairs to do the laundry, stand at the stove to cook or clean the kitchen after meals, and you are here to help me with the 1 thing I can’t do is drive, because of a seizure disorder and even after surgery to correct it, I am still unable to get my license because I have to go 1 year without a seizure and it just isn’t going that way, and as I write this post I am getting this strong feeling that the Lord has a reason for this. The biggest situation is what will happen when she is no longer here with us , I guess we will cross that bridge, when the road meets that bridge, because of the situation with our lives being opposite with what she can do and what I can do , I have dedicated a song to her,  Islands in the stream, by Dolly Parton, it describes how different our lives are, but yet the love we have for each other is great, sure as all married couples, we have are differences and disagreements, but we work them out.  In the beginning of our marriage we had alot of arguments and screaming matches, but The one thing that we have agreed on is never fight over finances, that isn’t to say that no you can’t get this or that,  there is the song by Kool and the Gang CHERISH  but when the money has been spent we can only say it is spent and was it necessary to but or could we have gone without it, and then there is the song by Kool and the Gang, Cherish, it describes what we have, everyone cherishes something whether it be money, jewelry, there pets, ect. Don’t get me wrong it is nice to have these things but the best things to cherish is love, memories, and family without these three things what, do we have to hold on to. And with her knee situation, I dedicated this song to her to gave her something to treasure that no one can take from her. So my life with my wife has been a great life over all ….  I HAVE HAD THE LOVE OF A LIFE TIME.
(With the knowledge of my son, he was able to upload this song to finish off this post ) A fitting end I think!!!